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Blogging while under the influence.


Blogging while under the influence, happens to be common place for me of late. Not that I have chosen to abuse drugs, or medications ( wink, wink, those legal drugs or other wise) nor have I mixed alcoholic drinks with drugs, or medication. Unless water and coffee counts as a mixer? No! I happen to be under doctors orders and some such. Not that the doctor ordered me to also be blogging while using pain medication. It seem just to happen that way.

Surgery had its price to pay. Thus, drugs are and will be in part of my life, in the short run, as well as my life, my blogging life. So please bare with me. Some of my blogs will certainly make more sense as time goes on. But if you choose to follow along in my foot steps, in an attempt to making more sense of my ramblings? I prefer coffee and pain medication myself. I get the sleepiness with the medication, the zoom, zoom with caffeen, and the ultimate crash and burn when one over powers the other.

It kind of looks like this. The computer laptop in my lap, with my upper body slouched over it, and with every twitch of my fingers pressing another key on the key-board. A new blog post is born. Or like this…. The computer on my lap, me sleeping it off and the cat kneading at the key board with her paws.

I know it looks impressive when I wake up. Wow! Some 30,000 words or letter caricatures typed. Rubbing my eyes… allowing myself to wake-up and freeing myself from my cats typing. I realize that typing thoughts down while under the influence, even if it is under the care of a doctor… Isn’t advisable.

But sitting there, with nothing much to do, other than trying to decipher just how smart the cat really is? This should be a sign, that I may need to also have some realistic reevaluation of this situation. Drugs do funny things to the mind. Yes, the cats typing may get lucky now and again. Typing a few letters that also could be mistaken for words to humans. But this coincidence, and doesn’t make for an impressive new discovery? Or “The Worlds First Cat Blogger!” Unless her blog posts gets more followers or responses then my latest ones. I stand by my assumptions, and observations.

In your dreams kitty.. in your dreams!

Of course, I’m not telling her my dreams just yet. Being under the influence of medication, my dreams have the cat doing far more than that. So in keeping her well grounded, down to earth with her ego. Mum is the word.

Some other problems with being under the influence of medications, are just remembering when you have had your last dosage. Phantom pain, arrives, and mocks me into believing that I haven’t had any for such a long time…. in reality about 5 minuets. But when in battle with Phantom pain, 5 minuets is an eternity-of-time? Note to self ( this is probably why I wake-up with the cat typing on the computer? So turn off the computer first!) But then… it could also be, the cat is hungry and the medication is bitter to taste. I seem to be having some trouble with the last line. It’s not that I have given the cat some of my medication. It is when I have dropped a pill or two and the cat pounces on it with vigor, at least faster than I can respond under my condition. I’m sure she has tasted it? Just how I’m sure of that is? I see her rubbing up against the pill bottle with that kind of love in her eyes, as if to say…. ” I have two tickets to paradise, pack your bags and come catch a ride with me…” after all I have seen that kind of expression on her face, also in her writings. Oh, how she loves those bitter-sweet pills!

A nother dead give away is when, she is sleeping on her back. Paws stretched out, full extension into the air, and moving like she is running on the moon, or the ceiling at the very least. That lush! She seems to have a bigger problem then I do, and no doctors note to boot! Just saying kitty, Your cut off!

Well, well, here we are at that time where I have to take pills again. So I must shut-down the computer, for the obvious reasons. Because the cat will hog the key-board, or try to catch a lick or two of pill residue off my fingers when I’m passed out. Not a good combo. As I have already explained to you all. Untill next time. Enjoy your life as is. Being under the influence isn’t all that fun in deciding which experiences are indeed real and which are just drug induced remembrances, given to us by doctors orders.

All the best.

Unlimited expectations


While fanning the flames of unlimited expectations, we must consider success comes from chasing our dreams even to the ends of the earth. We shouldn’t worry about the things that we do not control. But rather we should worry, about the things that are also in our power to control, yet we choose not too! Everyone has dreams of unbelievable fantasy’s, unlimited expectations of something more positive then what we are experiencing at the moment. But then while looking over the neighbors fence, at everything he or she may have. It will always seem so much greener then our own. It is best not to live on dream like fantasy’s alone. Dreams are ment to be the inspirations to our life’s work, in making todays dreams into tomorrow’s reality’s. Not all dream that grace our mindsets are destin to become reality’s though. Some are so outrageous that there is no way, it is ever going to happen. Unreasonable? Why? Could it be when we get older, we have just forgotten how to dream big?

Celebrating the kid in us all, I say ” GO BIG OR GO HOME! ” At least with our dreams. Remember when we were kids, somehow life was ment to be lived on the razors-edge of dream versus reality! Every problem is solvable! Every obstacle is small in size! Every goal is achievable! Because life is full of unrestrained, unlimited expectations.

When things don’t always work out in my favor! I often ask myself. ” What would my younger self do?”

I know it is somewhat stupid? Asking yourself such a question. But it is better than going with the first impressions of acting on first feelings, followed by the first impulsive actions that came to mind. Kids often just act out in this way, and ask their questions later. But life isn’t a multiple choice questionnaire, to be filled out with first impressions. Now is it?

It isn’t all that cool, for a grown man to throw a tantrum. Yet my younger self would have. Life just sucks at time. I’m finding out, asking what would younger self do? As a way of looking for some painless outcome to the problems of some hours ago, net alone the present problems. Refusing to contemplate what true potential outcome of what ever the answer is. In hind sight, what only seemed like it could have turned out better than it did.

Why is it more appropriate for adults to enter a room that appears empty, and out of frustration just scream out at the top of our lungs. Only to have our eyes adjust to the situation. Slowly at first untill they become fully in focus, seeing all the other people in the room. The first thing that comes to mind is making an effort for a neat coverup. Saying out loud. ” Tension breaker! ”

Everyone who is by now recovering from the yelling heart attack, that you equally distributed to them. Who are now looking at you like, “your crazy.” Seem to have calm down somewhat when they hear your excuse. It is suddenly more acceptable behaviours if and when the “Tension breaker ” excuse is used. Thinking. It could have happen to them I’m sure. They reason. So why not screaming adults in a room, it’s a tension breaker? Is it throwing a tantrum? Should it just be seen, to these same people as an opportunity to call the insane asylum, as fast as their fingers could dial their cellphones?

Why?

Okay, kids tantrums last longer I guess. But there is also yelling, complaining, excuse making, more yelling, kicking, throwing one self down, and finely playing the attitude card of, ” No one cares!” After all of that, then walking away pouting and muttering to ones self. That’s okay for kids. But insanity for adults! What I’m saying is ” Kids start out in life being insane? Slowly as they grow up they then gain some of their sanity? I guess we are all just on that razors edge of having sanity / or being insane! But for adults the tension breaker scream is shorter in duration. But isn’t it, also the same thing then as throwing a tantrum? Prehaps a shorter duration of such outbursts, is so the adult can also make a quick escape. Never knowing just when the men in white suits will arrive, with your straight jacket.

Is the need of a tension breaker just the same thing for the youngster, and the adult who is young at heart? With building pressures and frustrations, both reasonable, and unreasonable, the need of a tension tantrum / breaker, always ends with this kind of result. Because adult people who also use the tension breaker, must certainly have asked themself. “What would the younger self do? ” Relying then, on past experiences of simpler times to give some reasonable reaction to the situation.

Kids seem to learn by doing. Throwing the tension breaker tantrum doesn’t always work. Then finely it stops working all together. What gives? Those unlimited expectations just keep on coming though. Along with those frustrations. Because things are suppose too….

Take a deep breath and let it our slowly.

Kids insanity’s seem to comes and go at will. Mainly because kids are hard-wired to be curious about everything. Being frustrated about something one minute. Then look over here…. no over there… What is that… coud I play with that… Is mom looking? The thoughts are running wild, with the imaginations, that fueled the fires of creosote’s.

With age they seem to remember for a longer time just why they were frustrated and therefore are more willing to act out with some reason. The thought posses is not always reasonable though.This is the times when all parents are checking with themself’s and each other. Just to see if sanity still exists, or is that just becoming an unachievable dream. Not yet realized, by the adult mind. Parents who have fought with kids about the unimportant. Never seem to see that they are involved in some sanity testing, administered by the 3-year-old of the house. Parents who have fought the good fight, to a point of compleat and total exertion of energy. Stumble down the hallway, after the child has fallen a sleep. The parent has quietly escaped down the hall. Only to enter an empty room, so as to let out the silent rebel yell, of tension breakers, along with tantrum like gyrations, with the last of their energy.

At some point in a childs life-cycle. We adults have to explain, and teach rational thought, in dealing with some situations in life. Of course that’s when the child has also discovered the word and its meaning of ” WHY!” Is that, when the momentary lapse of reasons are thrown in to the wind. The common thoughts are then…” We as adults are at this point of loosing it and yet we are going to survive this ordeal. With all of our faculties in place, or we are going to be drinking heavily. In order to cover up our insanity. This also gives us the bad excuse of the alcohol made me do it. After all who wants to admit to, sanity is slipping away.”

Kids who have unlimited expectations, dreams, and fantasy’s to match ( Unrealistic ones, as well as some impossible ones to boot.) never see these dreams as being impossible. I’m sure the person that came up with. ” Don’t make mountains out of mole hills.” Was just a 4 or 5-year-old that didn’t wish to hear the answer given by their parents in response to something unreasonable. The answer being ” NO! ”

“Why?”

“Because I said so.”

“Why?”

” Because I don’t have the money right now.”

“Why?”

Because I had to pay some other bills.”

“Why?”

“Because… Why don’t you ask your mom?”

How many times can the kid ask the question of “Why”? Why do I fall for that every time? Then answer it 5 or 10 or …..? See! They got me asking myself “WHY!” That’s the start of it all. Slipping down that slippery slope to the guys in the white suits. I was deep in thought, as what my next move should be?

When it comes to unlimited expectations. Why do kids change their minds so much with what they expect? It always starts off small and then, if you let them they can out spend the federal government in an afternoon, and still have more room to go for more before dinner. With the blizzards of ideas within their heads, where do they have the energy to throw a tantrum? When the expectations aren’t met, and the terrible answer still is ” NO!”

Remembering back to when it was time to get the family’s first pet, at the requests of our little bundle of joy. Yes this was the time when I had more of my sanity intact.

Grabbing my keys for the car we were heading out the door to buy, the goldfish. Half way down the stairs to the parking lot where the car was. It changed to…

“Let’s get a cat! They are fluffy and soft, not like a fish.” The excited voice expressed the unreasonable request, that was made by my little girl.

“Well I don’t know..” I was looking for the best excuse and fast. ” We don’t have a room for the cat. Yea! We need a house or something.”

“Well how about a dog then?” They are soft.”

She didn’t realize that they are one of the same thing. ” Well sweetheart we don’t have a house for a dog. They need a space to bark at mail-men.” I said. While climbing into the car buckling up with the seatbelts, then starting the car, and we were off to the pet store.

“Maybe we need to get to the pet store and take a look at all of the goldfish?” I suggested, as a way to get back to the fish for a pet thing. She didn’t look happy, but she was still quiet.

Pulling up to the pet store and I’m just looking for the closest bar by now! ” Yata, Yata, Yata, gotta go! The blizzard of ideas from your child is just too much. How are we going to…” I expressed to my wife with a good deal of frustration, yet holding back some.

She smiled at me and said. ” Lets just go in and see. It will be alright.” giving me a slight rub with her hand on my back, to calm me down some.

One hour later we were going home. We didn’t buy anything or so it seemed. My daughter was happy and just singing a happy song to her self, as we drove. My mind was numb and tiered of endlessly explaining to an unreasonable mind. That was full of thoughts of unlimited expectations.

” I’ll pick up the puppy from the store tomorrow on my way home from work.” My wife said.

“We bought a dog?” It was a flurry of open-ended ideas that were being tossed about in the pet store. I thought. ” When did we decide to get the dog honey?”

” Come on the dog is better idea anyway. She can ruff-house with it, and the dog can take it better than a cat. Don’t you think so?” She said.

“Well…” We bought a dog! I thought. Dogs bite! But then cats can scratch!  “Okay then! You will get the dog on your way home.” I answered. Talking a deep breath. Trying to hold back from doing what younger self would have done an hour ago, and just kept it up for that whole hour. Taking another deep breath…..

Looking back using the rear view mirror. I could see my daughter singing. Little did I know that the blistered’s of ideas were still bouncing off the walls of the young mind. Not just the reasonable ones either. After all she had changed her mind from the goldfish to cat, dog, rabbit, rat, mouse, monkey, back to dog but bigger ones, next to the snakes, then to the horse……ect. I took a deep breath, as my tension breaker, and continued to drive home in silence.

tomorrow couldn’t get here fast enough. But when it did all unlimited expectations were released, along with the unreasonable ones as well. My daughter looked at the big box with holes all over it, with great expectations! She could hardly wait. But when the lid came off there was no describing it. The loudest of tension breakers of screams came from this little girl?

” A puppy! NO! Not a Puppy!” She screamed.

I tried to explain. ” We live in an apartment and… you should be lucky to have a dog.”

She wasn’t buying it. She looked at me with all the determination a little girl could. Then said. ” Tale it back! I wanted a pony!”

” We live in a appartement sweety. We don’t live in a house, or farm. A pony lives on a farm and dogs can live in a appartement.” It was like talking to the wall.

She wasn’t listening to me at all. Unlimited expectations said. ” My last request was a pony and a pony it should be or else! ”

My thoughts, only had questions. “What to do next?” The one question that won was… “What would my younger self do?” If you can’t beat them. Join them!

We both let out the loudest of tension breaker tantrum scream, followed by the full-blown tantrum of shaking bodily gyrations, untill exhausted.

At that point, the puppy came over to lick us up. The dog’s way of saying. ” Glad to be a part of the family. Now where is the cat to chase around? ”

With unlimited expectations the hardest lesson to learn is…”We must learn our limitations, to then be considered to have grown up into being an adult! Rather than just being insane.”

All the best.

If dogs could talk!


                                             ( Do you hear what I’m saying?)

interesting concept I know. Dogs can’t talk, or can they? Not in the way you or I would talk to each other. But the barking they do, at or with other dogs, or fire trucks when they go by, or when a stranger that comes to the door to sell you on the latest religion’s flavor of the week. Isn’t it just for fun? Isn’t barking just dogs ways of expressing words, in the only way they can speak? Maybe not words like we would have chosen to say to each other in conversation, but those barks have some meanings to some dog out there. Have you seen dogs just bark, and bark, and then wonder, just what is with these humans? Why can’t they understand? Why do I waste my time barking at all? Seem like they just get upset, which leads them to threatening me, and tell me ( The dog) to be quiet. The next time a thief comes over to boost your car, I will be an award-winning pointer dog, and point in the direction of the spar keys. You know! The fake rock, right there in the garden, along with all of the other non rock like things. You know the only rock in the middle of a big barked off area. At least put some other rocks in the same place so it looks like you tried. You don’t have to have a rock garden. All to confuse you when your drunk. Who knows what goes through a dogs mind. They just look at you, and you at them, both of you just as confused about the other with this communication barrier.

( Listen up only telling you once!)

Being human how are we to know just what a dog is saying or trying to tell us? On the other hand, we all know someone who has a dog that barks at everything! So yes they can look confused, or easily tricked by the door bell, or a person knocking on some door in a move on TV, phones ringing, kids playing a bit to loud out on the street, sudden movements in general. All in all, the list goes on and on if we let it. We just keep on thinking stupid dogs! But are they really stupid? They may be one of the ultimate animals that have trained us instead of the us training the them?

Who doesn’t like the family dog greeting us when we get home? Mans best friend or what? They are just happy! Wiggling, wagging, maybe some barking, tongue licking / a slobbering welcome home party in a dog. Just try to get this kind of attention from your kids, or spouse. Okay skip that last one. So that is the views of the human owner, when at first we open the door. The dogs point of view maybe somewhat different indeed.

For the bigger dog who has been outside all day long, maybe just thinking; It’s about time! I freezing my butt off out here. Would it hurt to leave some extra food in my bowl to last all day? A ball to play with? Are you kidding me? Just where is the smaller version of you to throw it? Did I mention the word ball? Throw me a bone! Will you?To chew on that is. I like bones, but please leave some meat on them, I like meat too! Or they could be thinking. All right! My owner is home where are all of the bitches? I remember when you pimped me out for stud service. But did you ever explain just why this isn’t going to happen everyday? No! No! Do not make watch you have a party with your girl friends, when you haven’t thought of me that way. I will let you get away with just about anything if you put beer in my water / beer dish! All in all if any one of these things doesn’t happen in part, ( just one! I’ll let you pick.) it may cause you to get bitten! Who really knows for sure. Dogs could have fantasy?

( Just seem like there is three of us! I’m excited! Your home.)

For the smaller dogs they are thinking; It is about time! It has been so long, and it is hard to walk around my domain / your house with crossed legs. Must not pee yet! But real excited and…oopi. It was just a little, the pressure you know! Where is my ball? I’ll run and find it real fast and then we can go out right? Hay the door is over here… if you don’t take me out I’ll pee in my favored spot! Chew on your leather shoes! Okay ! If you don’t take me out right now! There is going to be an accident! I’m not going to be responsible for it!

As a human we can say “stop”, our dog knows just what this means. Doesn’t mean that they will obey! But if a dog barks at the human, even if it is an excited bark. Is still just a guess by people as to just what the dog wants at this point. Now who looks stupid? People expecting a dog to understand and listen. But people hear the barks of dogs, in one ear and out the other, only paying attention when it becomes awkward. Never really asking themself’s just what is up or taking some sort of action. Dogs have needs. Most people are good dog owners, and pay really good attention to their dogs. But the dog usually know more words of any human language, then any human understanding most kinds of dogs barking’s.

Why is it that dogs love their belly rubbed. More like they are addicted to this. No sooner than, right after you quit, the dog looks at you like What? So soon? Are you a quitter? It’s not like you do this all day long! But that would be cool with me if you did! So the looks on their faces seem to say at least. It is addicting for them. But it was a cruel quark of nature, to give them paws, instead of hands. If they had hands, they wouldn’t have a need to be so nice to humans. Is that where the phrase comes from. ” You have two hands so get it your self!” If dogs had hands! Well they would just lay around the house on their backs rubbing there belly’s all day. At least till they find out just where the food is kept. Then right back at it, till bed time.

( My human makes me so mad, I could strangle him if I had hands! Now that’s a dog treat!)

If dogs had hands you may find your shoes tied together, or hiding thing on you, or playing pranks on you that requires hands. You may even find yourself tied up to your bed posts in the morning. No! Your girl friend didn’t just leave you like that. Its mans best friend playing pranks on you. Remember the stud services? Your dog doesn’t either! idle hands are the devils work shop! That’s what your dog is barking out at you. Bark! Bark! Well you work too much and your staying home today! You would have to be half drunk to believe that, or have translated it.The “bark” from the book ” barking into english for dummy’s.” By now your probably checking by a sly glance in the direction of your dogs paws / hands. Think about it. Dogs have personalities, just as people do. So be glad that they have paws, or the world would be so different between you and mans best friend.

( Can we talk? Okay maybe later? Can I say one more thing?)

Despite the fact of just how funny people are for dogs to wonder about. It is the funny faces that dogs make in trying to figure us out, just how to train people better. At least so people come to have a greater understanding of dogs wants and wishes. Not so much to ask, when you consider how much dogs give already to people, even if people refuse to learn just what a bark means. It seems like I have to always repeat myself, so our dog is thinking. In turn people always say the same things like ” Stop!” Okay I will. But your going to be rubbing my belly!

” Bark less! Wagging more! ” Quote mans best friend. from the book ” Translate bark into english for dummy’s”

“Bark less! Wagging your ass-off on the dance floor!” From the book ” Translate bark into slang used in America, for dummy’s”

All the best!

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